Internal struggle disrupts
The serenity promised.
I do what I should not,
I sacrifice great healing,
For instant gratification.
I am broken.
I am a disappointment.
I ignore what is freely offered.
I turn away avoiding connection.
Isolation being familiar.
Fear controls me.
I let it.
Jesus offers another way,
I reject it.
I am cozy with apprehension,
It is a loyal companion.
God wants to heal,
I turn away.
God wants to befriend,
I look elsewhere.
God appeals to my heart,
I desire what I can see and touch.
When will I learn to accept,
What is always in my grasp?
To reach for peace,
To absorb the comfort,
Internalizing the promises,
That will set me free.